Going Gray

Sometimes as a new mom, we get into a damaging "all-or-nothing" mindset.

Does this sound familiar? We eat healthy or we don't. We practice self-care or we don't. We're a good mom or we're not. Perhaps you already know that this way of thinking can wreak havoc on our self-confidence and our need to feel competent as a person and a parent. If this sounds familiar, then let me take this moment to remind you that there is a large middle ground in each of our lives called "gray". And if you're meeting "gray" for the first time, you're in for a real treat.

Neither black of white, gray is where possibility and practicality meet. It's a place where feelings of capability and worthiness are encouraged. Success happens more often there and feels better when it does. Gray allows small risks, then the chance to evaluate how they work out and take larger ones if the effort seemed worth it. Compared to it's more rigid pals of black and white, grey is flexible. 

What does gray look like in reality?

Gray is opting to do one vaccination at a time instead of the usual 2-4 because it still feels responsible but a lot less scary or painful.

Gray is deciding to go wheat-free as a trial period but eating the homemade bread that your brother-in-law proudly brought you as a housewarming gift.

Gray is acknowledging that you likely can't make a weekly playdate but will attend as many as you can.

Gray is working a 15 hr a week job doing something you like because having your own money is important to you.

Gray sets you up for success. It allows space for error, changing our mind and wrong turns without making us feel like an idiot. When we adopt a gray mindset, we give ourselves a safe space to be vulnerable trying something new. This is a good thing because what isn't new when you're a new mom?!  As a new mom, gray is crucial. We're learning who we are as a mom. Compassion not only matters but makes this journey more bearable.

What does gray look like for you?  Leave a comment below.

Thank you as always, for reading. I'm glad that you're here.