Why You Should Ditch The People Who Say "get over it"

Abuse isn't something to "get over".

You were hurt. It was painful and horrible, not fair. You didn't deserve it. It wasn't your fault. You have the right to be angry, mournful, actively sad or any emotion at all about what happened.

Don't let anyone try to rob you of your feelings about the abuse. People who say "get over it" or ask when you will be over it, are attempting to control you to make themselves more comfortable. They have no right to do that.

Don't let them control you.

You are fine, just as you are. And if you are not fine, you should consider getting making changes so you aren't feel healthier. You deserve that. People people minimizing your experiences or your feelings are not worthy of you.

Remember The First Best Thing and go from there when you're building (or dismantling) relationships.

Dumb, brave or vulnerable? You've got a feeling...

How are you doing today? 

What is the emotion that's going on for you right now? For me, it's impatience. I'm wanting resolution about something and it hasn't happened yet. I feel impatient and cranky about that.

Often we answer "fine" when someone asks us how we are doing. Even if we aren't fine. We don't want to be too much for someone else or for our "stuff" to overwhelm them. We tend treat the person asking as if they aren't quite capable of taking care of their own needs. 

We need to do better...by them and us.

When we own how we are feeling, we acknowledge it. We give it the credit it is due. And when we do that, we are better able to accept the feeling and move through it. It is counter-intuitive but acknowledging how we are feeling allows us to control the emotion, instead of feeling like you are being managed by your emotions.

So let's try it again- how are you doing today?

There is a list of 30ish feelings above. Choose one, two or even three and leave me a comment below.

Is yours there? Leave me a comment below and tell me what to add to this list.

Thanks for reading.