Ignoring The Thing That Hurts

As women we look the other way a lot. We ignore the online comment that is an insult or we make decisions out of default, watching the hours or days pass by without any action other than noticing. Sometimes we even ignore our own internal or external hurt. We often aren't willing to really sit with the thing that feels uncomfortable and then take action to make that issue feel better. "The devil you know" and all that allows us to sit, usually unchallenged, in our own hurt. Until now.

Opening up into whatever hurts is painful in the obvious ways. If you've been ignoring a physical pain or health concern, it could be painful having that area explored by a physician. I get it. Even if your hot spot isn't physical, it can be painful just talking about whatever hurts you. But you need to. Because you deserve better.

I've spoken with clients who justify the pain that they're in as "payback" for something that they did wrong in the past. Honestly, it wasn't that long ago that I thought the same thing. But in the years since, I've come to the conclusion that no one deserves to be hurt because of something that they *think* they did wrong in the past. And even if I did do something wrong, overall, I'm a good person. Everyone makes mistakes. But if it feels important to ask for forgiveness for your past mistake, do so to whomever you need to. I give it to you here as well. And then, move on to paying attention to your own hurt. Bring your attention back to that.

You're the one that others depend on. You keep family circles together as well as circles of friends from high school. You remember others' birthdays and bring food when someone is sick or had a new baby. Your presence means the world to so many people. You don't deserve the internal suffering that is a by-product of you sticking your head in the sand. And that's true no matter what you've done.

When you sit with your hurt and concentrate on mending it, your heart becomes lighter. Your shoulders will spring back from their crunched position. Deep breathes will come without prompting. Your sleep will be better, you'll be less inclined to head for a sugar fix and more inclined to smile. Paying attention to your hurt and mending it reaffirms your commitment to yourself as a woman who deserves love and good fortune. Because you do.

What's your hurt that needs to be mended?